The stories of Conservative Christians facing the law over their views on homosexuality are not new (see here for example) however this one seems to be different to me.
Providing a service to someone, and discriminating against them purely because of their sexual orientation (as in the example of the B&B) is completely wrong in my opinion. If you are providing a service to the public, then you accept them no matter how what. Discriminating against them because of gender, beliefs, sexual orientation, age colour, whatever is wrong. No one chooses to be either of these things - people are people, and deserve to be treated with respect - the Christian should be the light shining in the darkness in this instance.
However, I believe the case of fostering and adopting is different. As a youth worker, I believe in the ability of young people to make informed choices, and actively work to enable this to happen - however the ruling that Conservative Christians cannot adopt or foster due to their beliefs assumes something a little different about young people.
I grew up in a home where I didn't always agree with my parents - I am sure you can empathise. You see, every young person has parents with outdated views, beliefs, opinions. We all have mums who embarrassed us in school, or dads who said the wrong thing...
Through the growing up period of my life, did I blindly accept their opinions? To a point, yes - but then as I got older, no. I questioned, I investigated, I rebelled, I formed my own mind... Did my parents reject me because of it? When we came to fundamental irreconcilable differences, was I kicked out, or unloved? Of course not...
Why then assume Conservative Christian couples (who many consider to have outdated views) should be any different to 90% of the population, and refuse them the right to have children?
As a youth worker, I believe that child would form their own opinion on the subject of homosexuality in light of, and maybe in spite of their parents... (as is their right). and further to that, I believe if that child grew up and discovered he/she was gay - that couple would love him/her anyway, as nearly every other parent would...
The argument therefore is not about beliefs - because we all have them, regardless if we are atheist, agnostic or Christian - but it is about love and can the parents provide a loving home in spite of their beliefs? It is about acceptance and seeing past 'perceived faults' to love the individual anyway. If they have these qualities, then does anything else matter? Of course it is a risk, but surely no more risky than any other family dynamic...
Perhaps the experiences of young people who have 'come out' to conservative parents should be examined more carefully - to examine how this relationship survived or not as the case may be...
- Of course there are examples where relationships have broken down, where parents have not accepted their children, where gay men and women have not and never well tell their parents out of fear. However this is only one side of the story.
- There are stories where children have come out to parents they assumed would disown them, only for a journey of education and liberation to begin, where the family discover something new, have their long-held beliefs challenged and transformed to accept their child.
Focusing in on this single issue is of concern and narrow minded. This is not the only area where such dynamics are at play... Think of teenage pregnancy for example.
Young people do not blindly follow their parents values, assuming otherwise is disrespectful to the intelligence of adolescents. It's also incredibly naive and ignores the countless experiences of young people up and down the country - I can understand why such a decision makes sense in the corridors of power. Diversity must be embraced, "difference is to be encouraged, narrow mindedness, bigotry and homophobic opinions must be things of the past"...
However does this not edge on the precipice of censorship. Does this not ignores the clumsy reality of family life with it's hurt, pain love and acceptance, all of which goes into the journey of forming a well rounded individual.
I don't know - but what I do know is that this does not sit well with me, not primarily because of the Christian couple's beliefs, but because of what those in power assume about the dynamics of family life and the role young people play in forming their own independent beliefs and values...
Of course, I reserve the right to completely disown all of the above in the future, as this is just how I see things today...
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